Thursday, April 1, 2010

the day that changed everything.

a year ago today, my world changed forever.
it feels like yesterday and a million years ago, simultaneously.
i'll never forget the moment that i saw my uncle raymond knocking on my front door.
it had been a good morning with cash - he had just gone down for his first nap and i was sitting at the computer, listening to the 'across the universe' soundtrack and paying some bills (the only reason i remember that is because that night, when nate and i came home to get stuff to spend the night at mom's, i went over and finished paying them. because i knew i would never remember to do it otherwise.)
i opened the door for raymond.
he told me dad's plane was in an accident.
i asked if dad was ok.
he said he didn't think so.

you know how there are just some memories that you can re-live? this is one of them.
the rest of the day and following week was a blur of sheriffs, priests, reporters and friends.
our house a revolving door of commotion.
i remember countless hugs. piles of food. epic poopy diaper changes. awkward moments at the funeral home. staying up until 1 am writing my euology. bag pipes playing at the grave sight. a hug from my uncle raymond that completely dissolved me. still does.

he reminds me so much of dad.
dad and him had an interesting relationship. you could always tell dad was the big brother.
raymond would frustrate him so much sometimes.
it always made me laugh because the things that drove dad crazy, were things he was guilty of himself.

i'm so thankful that i have him. and my other uncles.
they all remind me of dad in their own way.
the same ways that all four of them reminded me of my grandpa bob.

i'm going to spend today remembering dad.
being thankful for the wonderful family he left behind.
and feeling blessed for having been able to call him my dad for 21 years of my life.

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