Thursday, June 23, 2011
so i think i'm pretty damn funny.
actually, i think i'm fucking hilarious.
but lately, i've been feeling off my game.
perhaps because i'm feeling overwhelmed, tired, pissed off, defeated...or maybe all of the above.
or maybe it's because the crazy crap that always seems to happen to me (and which i used to think is funny) now just exhausts me.
the other morning piper ran off. (we've been working on teaching her to stick with us in the yard without a leash and, obviously, it hasn't been real effective.)
i was already running late and didn't have time to retrieve her so i yelled at nate to get the damn dog and left.
when i got to the end of the driveway, i spotted her playing with the neighbor dogs.
even worse, she spotted me and came running.
i rolled down the window and said, "piper, GO HOME."
and drove off.
which is precisely the moment she decided to give me a gray hair and started chasing the car.
down the road.
for half a mile.
i finally gave up, stopped the car, let her jump in and headed back for home.
nate was just coming outside when i pulled up so i told piper to tuck and roll and then headed back down the driveway.
halfway to the street i realized i didn't have cash's shoes.
so i turned around. AGAIN.
when i came in the house nate was all, "what did you forget?"
and then i burst into tears.
because i'm a girl.
and also, apparently an emotional wreck. (i'd like to chalk this instance up to being kept up all night by a certain husband playing his xbox really loud, but really i probably would have cried semi well rested or not.)
or take the other day when nate locked me out of the house.
i had given my house key to amanda one day when she was watching cash and hadn't put the key back on my key ring.
which didn't seem like a big problem until i got home and realized, HEY i'm locked out now.
since i've broken into our house once before, i figured i would be able to get through it unscathed this time.
and then i remembered, this is me. in other words, fat fucking chance sarah.
needless to say, i've had a huge bruise on my arm all week from the storm window crashing down on top of me (which is what happened last time - see? i don't learn.)
and the bitch of it all?
i could see my house key sitting on the counter THE ENTIRE TIME.
it was just sitting there, taunting me. hey sarah, remember when you didn't put me back on your key ring? bet you're regretting that now huh, smarty pants!
is 24 too young to start day drinking?